Unspeakable Joy! (Val)
Thank you, Val for telling us about this powerful testimony. Thank you, Good Father for unspeakable joy that is available to us! I ask you for that joy to fill again all those who hear this testimony! If you search google images for “joy”, dozens of pictures of people jumping come up. I pray that today you would have the joy that causes your limbs to spontaneously fly into the air. 🙂
“The joy of the Lord is my strength.” It’s a verse that I’ve quoted over and over for many years now. Yet only now and then had I really experienced true joy or peace.
I lost my job in January 2010. It was quite literally the greatest shock of my life, and yet driving home that day, sobbing to the point where I could hardly see the road in front of me, I drew a line in the sand. I told the enemy that I already had victory in Jesus and that I would trust God no matter what. Well, to say the least, it’s been an incredible 16 months. I have grown in my understanding of who God is and who I am in Him, experienced deep emotional and physical healings, received very specific promises related to my life and situation, seen Him come through for me in the most kind and loving ways imaginable, and learned to hear His voice in almost every circumstance. At this point, I can honestly say I would not trade these months – or the experience that led to them – for anything.
During this time, I’ve also heard some wonderfully uplifting, prophetic words spoken over me, including a number of people who have talked about the deep joy they sense in me. For a long time I would just smile, because in many ways that joy seemed natural to me. Then one day, God opened my eyes and I realized how overwhelmingly, jaw-droppingly amazing it was for people to see – and me to feel – such joy. Why? Because though I’ve been a believer since I was ten, I have experienced periods of deep depression throughout my life, and while I never actually attempted suicide, I had reached a point more than once when I seriously contemplated how to do it.
About three years ago, at the age of 48, I told God point-blank that I would and could not live the second half of my life as I had lived the first, never knowing when the depression and sense of hopelessness and emotional abandonment would hit or how long it would last, and that He had until I was 50 to heal me, or I would kill myself. I know this sounds a bit over the top, and many people will find it horribly disrespectful toward the Gracious God of all Creation, but one thing I’ve learned over the years is that He expects and accepts complete honesty from us, and I believe that He knew that I meant what I said. I didn’t know what He would do, or how He would accomplish it, but I put my trust in Him. If He had a plan for me, he had to heal me.
Well, there’s no question that He’s been working especially hard in me these past 16 months, but when He tapped me on my shoulder not long ago and said, “Little Valery, do you see how I heard your prayer and have replaced your depression with a ‘joy unspeakable’ that’s visible to people all around you? “, I was flabbergasted. I don’t know how I had missed it, but He had done it, and I was healed. And now when the enemy whispers something in my ear that could lead me back to those dark days, I stand firmly on the Truth of what God has done in me through His Word and Spirit. When I think about His goodness, kindness and gentleness, and realize that what He’s done and is doing for me, He wants to do for every one of His children, I can only cry. He is amazing beyond words, and sometimes only tears will do. Tears of joy, of course.